What I Wish I’d Known When I Started Out
A couple of weeks ago, I asked this question on LinkedIn:
“If you’re a senior female lawyer, can you let me know:
What is the one thing you wished you’d known earlier in your career?”
I received replies from many women across various roles and firms, and I am enormously grateful to those of you who took the time to reply. I have kept the replies anonymous as promised.
I have added my own thoughts at the end of the blog.
Did You Ask Nicely?
Studies have shown that there are social sanctions for women who ask for more money that do not apply for men. This is because women are breaking gender norms - the norms that they should be grateful for what they are given. For women of colour, the sanctions are stronger.
The advice given by some quarters to counteract this is to “ask nicely”. To adopt a friendly social style. To lean in and smile whilst asking in a friendly tone for what you want.
Smile, but not too much.
How to Claim Your Power as an Influential Woman in Law
We had the incredible Dion Johnson deliver an inspiring masterclass to Female Lawyers’ Club in which she talked about the P.O.W.E.R principle: the secret to unlocking and unleashing your most powerful expression as a woman, leader, and changemaker in law.
Dion is a Board-level leader, development strategist for women in senior leadership, author and international conference speaker. Dion challenges women leaders to respond to the call to show up, speak up, and shake things the hell up in their industry.
Public Speaking, anyone?
I’d planned as well as I could. This included writing out a full script in case I lost my way.
I’m still scarred from the horror of watching a colleague completely freeze in front of a boardroom full of clients and colleagues years ago, as she completely lost her way during her talk and ended up silently walking out midway through.
It was the stuff of nightmares. I was on immediately after her, so couldn’t even check if she was ok. Ever since that day, I’ve made fairly detailed notes before any presentation so, if all else fails, I can at least read the notes and muddle through. Some people can pitch up and just talk really well, with no prompts. I’m not one of those people. And that’s ok.
Are you having fun?
I’m currently reading “Feel Good Productivity” by Ali Abdaal. In chapter one, Abdaal talks about how having fun is likely to make you more productive and happy at work. He suggests that, when approaching a task we’re less than enthusiastic about, we ask ourselves a question:
“What would this look like if it were fun?”
I really like this idea. Fun, however, can be hard to come by in the first week of January. After all, it’s the week when we take down the Christmas decorations, come back to work and eat only vegetables after what is for many a fortnight-long cheese and booze-fest. The party’s over, so where’s the fun in that?