Why ‘just be yourself’ is terrible advice for women leaders
“Just be yourself.”
It sounds empowering , but for many women in senior roles, it’s not only unhelpful but sometimes downright confusing.
In a recent Female Lawyers’ Club masterclass, leadership coach Anya Smirnova explored why authenticity can feel complicated for women leaders, and how to navigate it without holding yourself back.
The career advice every senior female lawyer needs right now
At first, I was slightly put off by the title Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office by Dr Lois P. Frankel.
I worried it might reinforce the tired myth that women have to be ruthless, or worse, unpleasant, to succeed. Early in my career, one of my most important role models was a female partner who was both highly respected and kind. She proved that you don’t have to sacrifice decency to achieve authority. We all know women (and men) in leadership who are not kind, but that is not the model most of us aspire to.
For every female lawyer who’s running on low battery
As female lawyers, we’re often expected to power through; to stay switched on and performing at our best, even when we’re beginning to run on empty.
But in her excellent book Wintering, Katherine May offers us a different perspective: winter isn’t a sign of failure or stagnation. It’s part of a natural cycle. A time when growth goes underground, gathering strength.
Just like us.
If you’ve ever underpriced a job… this one’s for you
Let me tell you a quick story.
One time, I gave a client a fixed fee to draft a contract.
Nice and simple, I thought. One draft, job done.
Except… It was not one draft.
What are you willing to tolerate?
A few weeks ago, I had the pleasure of hearing psychologist and author John Amaechi speak at Gunnercooke’s annual Symposium.
He has that rare ability to combine insight with humour - to make you laugh one moment and reflect deeply the next. His calm presence and gift for storytelling left a real impression on the room.