Is the Confidence Gap Holding You Back?

“Women need to shift from thinking ‘I’m not ready to do that’ to thinking ‘I want to do that—and I’ll learn by doing it.”

— Sheryl Sandberg

I recently hosted a panel discussion in celebration of International Women’s Day, interviewing Sarah Goulbourne, Co-Founder of Gunnercooke and Norah Durrant, Founder of Norah Durrant Recruitment and Female Counsel. One of the topics which came up was how lack of confidence can hold women back in their legal careers. Part of the discussion involved recognising that this is often a gender issue: men do not seem to struggle to the same degree with advocating for themselves or being confident in their abilities.

This is of course supported by evidence. You may well have heard the statistic that men tend to apply for a job when they meet 60% of the requirements, whereas women generally apply when they meet 100% of the requirements. Imagine the leagues of less than optimal men across the country taking up leadership positions that their female colleagues were better suited for but did not apply for, feeling they weren’t good enough. Actually, don’t. It’s not good for your blood pressure. 

Why does this happen? A mix of social conditioning, imposter syndrome, and a legal profession that still rewards ‘traditional’ leadership traits—many of which have historically been associated with men. Women are taught from a young age to be humble, to avoid risk, and to wait to be recognised. Meanwhile, confidence (not just competence) is often what gets people promoted in law firms.

The cost of self-doubt in your legal career

Lack of confidence can lead to missed opportunities, lower salaries, and slower career progression. If you don’t advocate for yourself, someone else—often less qualified but more self-assured—will be awarded the role you deserve. This isn’t about arrogance; it’s about ensuring your talent gets the recognition it deserves.

How to close the confidence gap (starting now)

1. Reframe your inner dialogue
   That little voice in your head telling you you’re not ready? Challenge it. Instead of thinking, “I’m not experienced enough,” try “I am capable of learning and growing into this role.” Successful lawyers aren’t the ones who never feel doubt—they’re the ones who don’t let doubt dictate their actions. Accept that it may feel uncomfortable at first but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it. Life begins at the end of your comfort zone, after all.

2. Act before you feel 100% ready
   Confidence doesn’t come before action—it follows it. Apply for that promotion, put yourself forward to deliver that presentation, and speak up in meetings. The more you take action despite feeling unsure, the more your confidence will grow.

3. Document your wins
   Keep a ‘positivity file’—a running document of your achievements, client praises, and successful cases. When doubt creeps in, look back at it as a reminder of what you’re capable of. Better yet, put some glowing testimonials on the wall next to where you work, so you are faced with constant reminders of your own value.

4. Find a supportive network
   Surround yourself with women who lift you up. At Female Lawyers’ Club, we help women build confidence, share experiences, and learn strategies to own their worth in the workplace. Confidence grows in the right environment.

5. Develop an executive presence
   Confident women in law firms get noticed. Work on your presence—how you enter a room, how you speak, and how you project authority. It may help to imagine how a confident role model (someone who know personally or a public figure you look up to) would act in this situation. Even small shifts in posture, tone, and word choice can make a huge difference.

You deserve to take up space

You’ve worked too hard to sit on the sidelines and wait to be noticed. The legal profession needs confident, capable women like YOU in leadership roles! So the next time you hear that doubtful voice, acknowledge it—and then do it anyway.

Enjoy the rest of your week.

Rachel