Why so many lawyers secretly hate business development
“I didn’t get there by wishing for it or hoping for it, but by working for it.”
Earlier in my legal career, the phrase business development used to make me shudder. I thought it meant awkward networking events, trying to “sell” myself, or being highly extroverted, none of which felt like me.
Last week in Female Lawyers’ Club, we hosted a fantastic masterclass with Lara Quie, Senior Director of Business Development at FTI Consulting, to banish the myths and uncover what BD is really about.
The main message from the session was clear: business development is about relationships, not selling.
One of the most fascinating parts of the session was when Lara shared research by Dr Larry Richard, a former lawyer turned psychologist who has studied the personality traits of thousands of lawyers. Compared to the general population, lawyers often score unusually high (or low) on certain traits. For example:
High scepticism → brilliant for spotting risks, but can make us slow to trust new people.
High urgency → great for deadlines, but makes waiting for a client reply feel unbearable.
High sensitivity to rejection → which explains why silence from a client can feel so personal.
When you see these traits written down, it’s no wonder that so many of us find business development uncomfortable. The good news is that once you understand these patterns, you can work with them rather than against them.
Lara’s message was reassuring: we don’t need to pretend to be someone we’re not. In fact, our natural strengths as women - listening well, showing empathy, being thoughtful - are exactly what makes clients want to come back to us again and again.
Here are a few of her standout tips:
You don’t need hundreds of clients - just a small number of the right ones.
Consistency matters more than grand gestures. Small, thoughtful touches go a long way. Since we don’t receive much post these days, why not surprise someone with a handwritten card?
Silence isn’t rejection. Clients are busy - a gentle follow-up is often all that’s needed.
LinkedIn is your shop window. Use it to stay visible and top of mind without being online all day.
It was such an inspiring conversation, packed with practical advice that anyone can use - even if you only have 10 minutes a week to spare or if, like me, you’re firmly on the introverted side.
For our members, I’ve put together a workbook and recording of the session with Lara’s practical tips, useful phrases, and space to create your own mini-BD action plan.
If you’re not yet a member and want access to resources like this, you can join us here today.
Enjoy the rest of your week,
Rachel