The Dinner Party
Picture the scene.
You’re in your favourite restaurant with your best friend.
It’s December 2024 and you’re celebrating the fact that you’ve FINALLY achieved your dream goal! As this is a really special occasion, you’re pushing the boat out and having three courses plus your favourite bottle; no expense spared.
The question for you today is – what will you be celebrating?
Do you have a goal for the year that will warrant a slap-up meal celebration?
Or are you going to carry on as you are and hope for the best?
If you don’t know what you want to celebrate by the end of the year, then how will it ever happen?
Are you having fun?
I’m currently reading “Feel Good Productivity” by Ali Abdaal. In chapter one, Abdaal talks about how having fun is likely to make you more productive and happy at work. He suggests that, when approaching a task we’re less than enthusiastic about, we ask ourselves a question:
“What would this look like if it were fun?”
I really like this idea. Fun, however, can be hard to come by in the first week of January. After all, it’s the week when we take down the Christmas decorations, come back to work and eat only vegetables after what is for many a fortnight-long cheese and booze-fest. The party’s over, so where’s the fun in that?
This one small tip will help rewire your brain
We deal with worst case scenarios on a day-to-day basis, so it is so important to make our hyper alert brains feel safe by noticing the good things. This very simple practice takes one minute every night and has genuinely made me happier and better able to cope with the stresses of a career in the law.
How to say no without everyone hating you
I know from speaking to female lawyers that saying no is something many of us struggle with. It’s not easy, after all, to switch off a lifetime of conditioning to be a “good girl” and trying to please everyone. Most of us are conscientious types who want to do well and the unfortunate corollary of this can sometimes be that we say yes to too many things.
There are many situations in which a female lawyer may be asked to do something she doesn’t want to do, or that isn’t in her interests to agree to. People have written whole books about how to tackle this. However, for today, I want to share a quick tip on saying no which I’ve found really helpful – it allows you to protect your boundaries and your relationship with the person requesting at the same time. Win!
I wasn’t expecting this…
Kindness is, after all, very much not a prerequisite for working in a law firm. Indeed, I suspect it would be actively frowned upon by certain members of the profession.
And yet…
What will we remember when we reach the end of our careers?
Yes, of course, we’ll remember the highs and lows of a career in a highly competitive (and occasionally dramatic) profession.
But won’t we remember most of all the times when we were treated with kindness in a profession where it can be in somewhat short supply?